Frugality in Caring for Ourselves and Our Family

Frugality is all encompassing in our lives.  Some people, for whatever reason, go to a variety of lengths for the sake of saving money.  I appreciate, even admire, those who live on such small amounts of money, stretching every last penny.

To begin, we need to address our medical needs.  I am one who believes very firmly that to take care of ourselves involves eating nutritiously, exercising within a reasonable amount (not becoming obsessive), getting enough sleep, and as the need arises, visiting the doctor, whichever one is necessary.

Eating nutritiously involves something different to each person.  Due to our uniqueness, each of our nutrition needs are different.  For example, a man who is 25 years old, 200 pounds, and works construction will have different nutrition needs than a 25 year old man, 200 pounds, and works behind a desk.  Our lifestyles need to take in to account how much exercise we get as well as our nutrition levels, how much we consume in carbohydrates vs not.

Eating nutritiously will also keep our bodies working at optimal levels, as does exercise.  I personally use hand weights, stretches, twists, leg lifts, walking, swimming and sometimes it feels like it isn't enough.  I'm considering adding in Christian Yoga as well as the T-tapp program.  These are programs for myself.  It wouldn't be "ok" for someone else, though.  I'm trying to look around to find these programs less expensively than "new."  I'm waiting patiently to find them.  That's a big part of this process of frugality--patience.

Getting enough rest is always a challenge, especially in today's busy society.  Everyone's body is unique and the needs of each person extremely vast, so to put everyone in to a cookie cutter of expectation is unrealistic.  As a parent it is our responsibility to make sure our children get the rest their little bodies need.  Also as a parent, it is important for us to care for our own needs for rest as well.  Sleep for moms of little ones who wake through the night is fleeting.  It is important for new moms to sleep when little ones sleep-round the clock to recover well from giving birth.  It is unrealistic, though, to expect toddlers and school age children to sleep as much as a newborn, so if mom has more children, it gets tricky juggling sleep.  I have put the older ones down for their naps, snuggled baby to nurse and fallen asleep with baby safely in my arms.  I've also put kid shows on, snuggled a little one, and fallen asleep for a 20  minute "catnap" without having an issue.  It is something to discover what would work well for your own family.  If a new mom doesn't get enough rest, she will develop Post Partum Depression.  I've been there before and it is a very scary place to be when the walls start closing in on you.  When that happens, it is important to tell someone to get some help.  In our society, it is a sign of weakness if we ask for help, but in my opinion, it is a sign of great strength to ask for help.

At the different stages of life there are greater needs for rest and less needs for rest.  We need to recognize those needs and adjust accordingly.  We need to communicate with our family of that need and ask for their help when we need to just go take an hour nap to feel re-energized to take on the rest of the evening fulfilling our responsibilities.

In order for our mind to work well, we need to eat, we need to sleep, and we need oxygen in the form of exercise.  In order to think about all that we need to accomplish, think clearly, and work on the variety of levels of frugality that our own personal family situation dictates, requires that we care for our bodies in an optimal manner at every stage of life.  Take care of yourself so you can take care of others!

Have a Blessed Day!

Accepting the Next Season in My Life

After having an ultrasound done last Monday, it was found that I have numerous fibroid tumors growing in my uterus.  The lining is thickened and my uterus is understandably enlarged.  The option of an ablation was given to me, but the thought of them scraping a potentially cancerous fibroid tumor does not appeal to me.  I've chosen a hysterectomy for that reason.  It still doesn't make the acceptance any easier.

I absolutely love being pregnant, having my babies, raising them (regardless of the head aches and heart aches), and I love doing all of it with my husband.  He's amazing!

That's why moving on to this next season of my life is so very difficult to accept.

The positive side of all of this is that through the course of a series of events, my husband has had a softened heart toward adopting a family group.  I am elated and it gives me quite a bit to look forward to, to prepare for, to pray for, to enjoy the journey.

This next door, though, is going to be the roughest part.  I still hold on to the lovely memories of having my babies.

When I Can Work

I have grandiose plans to declutter, paint and pack away bunches of books, decorations and just generally get much more organized than I am now after Christmas.  My own grandiose plans have come to a roadblock of sorts.  I have entered pre-menopause and my menses are changing, lengthening up to 14 days causing a drastic lowering of my iron levels.  When that happens, nothing can stop me from taking a nap, out of sheer exhaustion.  I can sit in my chair to rest from my work and in 5 minutes be sleeping.

I have increased iron rich foods to be best of my ability.  I cannot, however, ingest sardines or organ meat.  I have been in contact with my doctor as well as an OB/GYN to pursue the next step which right now is an ultrasound.  We need to find out if there are any fibroid tumors growing inside my uterus or any abnormalities.  If there are, then we'll likely go in for a hysterectomy.  If there are no abnormalities, I'll likely go in for an ablation.  In the mean time, I do what is needful, then rest.  I need to accept this season of my life for what it is--a chance to grow the response of my kids, growing them to understand what it means to be an adult--to take the responsibility for getting things done without being asked; to step up and just get things done.

As my dear friend, Cheryl at copperswife.com says, we must "hold our plans loosely."  And so, as I release the expectations I have for myself, the plans I have for my time after Christmas is over, and simply rest, I know that I can rest in the knowledge that this is His plan for me just for now.

God Bless,

In the Kitchen

This week, according to my calendar, is the week we deep clean the kitchen.  Yesterday was Monday, so it was dusting day.

This morning already, I've taken care of the kitchen windows on the inside.  You see, I'm the detail person.  It is my job to take care of each detail in the house.  What about the every day things?  Well, the children have been trained to vacuum, sweep, mop, do the dishes, unload the dishwasher, dry and put away dishes, wipe the counters and table, wash, dry & fold and put away laundry as well as hanging it out on the line.  So if my kids can do all of this, why do I do anything at all?  Well, as it goes with children, they don't see the details most of the time.  This is where I come in.  

The above schedule helps me to remember which room we're in for the week.  Yes, I need reminding.  I write things down so I don't have to remember it.  With all the appointments, classes and responsibilities I need to take care of, the less I need to remember the better!  This reminder is wonderful!  

I take care of myself better when I know things are done and cared for.  While "everything" isn't done at the end of the day, I know that I can see progress.  I've learned that this is better than not seeing progress, or heaven forbid, things get worse.  I don't kick myself in the pants for not doing xyz because I know it is going to be done on the above rotational schedule. So there is no guilt.  

Does my house resemble "tornado" status at times?  Yes!  But, the wonderful thing is that with one hour of steady work from 10 hands, things are much better!  

Throughout the month I take note of areas that need my attention and when that time comes up, I take care of it then.  This goes for the kitchen as well, unless there is a cupboard full of ants going after that ONE drop of honey that may have spilled.  (Ask Me How I Know!!!!)  Yes, there are times when you absolutely have to take care of those details that are right in front of your face.  It is a wonderful reminder for this Momma to remind children  who use the honey to make sure the bottle is wiped well before placing it back on the shelf.  We don't want any more ants!  Whew!  

Now, I'm sure there is another question running through your mind right now, "Why not just clean the whole kitchen instead of small bits and pieces at a time?"  I'm glad you asked!  I have many many hats that I wear throughout the day that need my attention (call my name, demanding at times...) so in order to maintain my own sanity by making sure those attention grabbers are tended to, I try to make sure the 15 minutes it takes me to tend to details in the room of the week after the necessary people needs are cared for.  Yesterday I wiped down walls.  It took me a little longer than 15 minutes, but I was the only person here at home.  After I was done I hung sheets out to dry and rotated the calendar above to the next 5-6 weeks.  Hurrying in the shower, I shuffled off to get the kids from berry picking, bring them home, push the oldest along to the shower to get ready for an appointment almost 2 hours away.  You see, the details were done in the morning.  This morning it was the windows.

Tomorrow the calendar says "declutter."  The refrigerator needs cleaned out and wiped down.  I need to go through my drawers to see if there is anything I can put in the yard sale we're having over the 4th of July.  I also have a junk drawer that needs some attention.

Thursday it says to "detail the floors."  I'll have my daughter sweep the floors really good this afternoon, then I'll scrub everything after taking them to work in the morning.

What about my husband's days off?  I try to spend as much time as I can with him when he's home.  But, when he's in the garage, I try to get my own work done.  Sometimes it happens.  Other times there are other things that pull at me.  The important thing is that I look at the calendar and make plans to do the work the Lord has given me and plan accordingly when I know I'll be busy.  Thursday I plan to do my Friday work in the afternoon so that I don't have to worry about it when I'm spending time with my hubby.  

Will this system work for you?  I don't know.  You can use it, but feel free to tweak it to your own family, home and needs.  Just pray about it and ask God for His direction.  That's what I did!  

Have a Blessed Day! 

Taking Care of Mom

In times past, posts like this have been about taking care of oneself, complete with someone blessing Momma with a cup of tea.

This time, however, it is different.  I am finding myself being the one checking up on my own Mother, making sure she's cared for after surgery.  The challenge is that she's 2,000 miles away.  I find myself being anxious about her care after she goes home because she has no one to look after her.  My heart is broken for her.  My aunt, my mother's younger sister, is there--just having returned home from vacation *just* last night.  Well, you know how incredibly busy you are after coming home from a vacation with things to wash, unpack and put away.  Since she is the only one available, she's there.  My heart breaks for her too.

This has taken a toll on my own heart--not physically, but emotionally and spiritually.  My heart is wrenching.  I know my sister has been there for my mother for a very very long time and she's tired of the variety of situations mother, being mother, that my sister has endured.  I don't fault her for having a life where she cannot get away and help.  Mother is a difficult person to love at times.  My sister doesn't have Jesus in her life, nor does she attend a Christian church on a weekly basis to get the support she needs from church family.  For someone to even try to love a person like my mother without Jesus in their life is a challenge in an of itself.

Here I sit, frustrated, unable to do anything for my mother from 2,000 miles away.  I cannot be there physically.  But, this morning I got to talk with her before she went in to surgery.  I told her that I loved her.  She said she loved me too.  I didn't hear that growing up, so as an adult it feels so very surreal.  I tell my own children that I love them numerous times a day, as well as my husband.  Love is a very easy thing for me.  I don't understand NOT loving.

I pray for her, for my aunt, for my brother and sister, and for a solution to help my mother and make sure she's cared for when she gets home.  My heart is wrenching, because I cannot be there to help her and to show her the love of Jesus.  I pray that a loving and wonderful group of Christian caregivers comes along to care for her.  I pray that she has help when she gets home.

Please join me in prayer for her as well.

Home Schooling Hiatus

We've home schooled our 3 children for 11.5 years.  I love the freedom this lifestyle affords because while staying within the parameters set by God in scripture and the laws of the state, we have lots of freedom to take days off when we school year around.

February always seems like a time when I desperately need a break.  Something just washes over me.  I've come to recognize it for what it is and take the break that I so desperately need.  This year has been much the same.  The feeling began on this past Saturday and it grew.  We went to our home school group on Monday, and it grew.  When facing needing to do school on Tuesday, there it was...right in my face.  I needed a break. 

I plan to snuggle, talk, do some cleaning, play some games and with the lovely temperatures where they are, we just might do some walking. 


Of course, I'll take some pictures. 

This one is a little blurry because it was taken from my cell phone.

We'll do lots of reading and I've given them the option to continue doing school if they want.  I have spoken with my husband and he's fine with checking their work for me if they decide they'd like to do more school while I take a break.  I told them they needed to take their work to the HKIC [head knight in charge]. 

I just might completely ignore looking at curriculum, planning and getting portfolio pictures and work taken care of.  ...just for this week. 

Because Momma needs a break.  It is healthy, it is good to rest....but not too long.  Before long, things will get hyper busy with Spring things. 

How about you?  Do you need a break too?  Give yourself a break then!  It is good to recognize those times when you need a break and grant yourself the grace you need to take it.  Jesus rested.  So can we!