Frugality with Clothing

Clothing needs for a family of various sizes can be one of the most frustrating chores to tend to for a variety of reasons.  We have had bins and bins full of clothes we've found at yard sales for children to grow in to, or ones that children have grown out of and saving them for the next child.

The challenge is very real to try to stretch every penny to cloth a growing family.  I love the challenge though.

I began every March in Pennsylvania, taking stock of every piece of clothing the children had.  With this inventory, I documented every pair of blue, black, tan jeans or pants, every detail that I could think of to ensure I knew everything my kids had in their dressers and closets.  I took that information and built a list of things to begin looking at yard sales, thrift stores, facebook flea markets, ebay, and every clearance rack I could find.  

I had to streamline their wardrobes when they were little, so I tried being very basic with one pair of tan, black, and blue dress pants, a couple long sleeved and a couple short sleeved dress shirts for church and special occasions.  I tried keeping an eye out for things I knew they would like, but being realistic.  

I worked very hard to find everything I could for them at yard sales first.  Yard sales were the best source for things I could find for $.50 or barter for a large purchase, grouping things together.  I loved being able to find things for my family very inexpensively.  

Once yard sale season was over, I took stock in how much I was able to fill with yard sales.  Once I saw how much, or how little, I was able to visit a variety of thrift stores getting things on their sale days.  I made sure to look for good quality clothing, always, and it always helped to look for name brands like Liz Claiborne, Old Navy, Lee, and etc.  I loved going to huge thrift stores and finding deals.

Next I'd always keep an eye out for my kids' sizes on the facebook fleamarket sites.  Sometimes I could get some good items, other times I just kept scrolling due to the unrealistic cost.  

Ebay was among the last points only because of the cost of shipping.  I've liked ebay because you can look for specific measurements for clothes to ensure a better fit.  Many times I've found jeans, shirts, things like that for less than half of what they originally cost brand new.

Which leads me to the last point--new.  Buying something new is so totally foreign to me.  We have always tried stretching so much for so long that it seems unnatural to buy something "new" off the rack.

Fortunately, when we followed this plan, we were able to drastically reduce our clothing budget.  

How do you make time for this type of work?  A little at a time!  One day for the inventory while you do that particular child's laundry, then move on to the next one.  It is more like a conveyor belt type of action once things get moving.  Once the inventory is done, you are done with it for a whole year.  Once you get your list done, you can simply just move on to your list.  I've tried pulling everything together in an Excel document spreadsheet so that I can see things much more clearly.  

I hope this helps someone!

Is there anything I've forgotten or not looked at?  Probably!  I hadn't even mentioned the bags and bags of clothes we were blessed with from friends. 😊

Have a blessed day!

God Bless,

Frugality in Caring for Ourselves and Our Family

Frugality is all encompassing in our lives.  Some people, for whatever reason, go to a variety of lengths for the sake of saving money.  I appreciate, even admire, those who live on such small amounts of money, stretching every last penny.

To begin, we need to address our medical needs.  I am one who believes very firmly that to take care of ourselves involves eating nutritiously, exercising within a reasonable amount (not becoming obsessive), getting enough sleep, and as the need arises, visiting the doctor, whichever one is necessary.

Eating nutritiously involves something different to each person.  Due to our uniqueness, each of our nutrition needs are different.  For example, a man who is 25 years old, 200 pounds, and works construction will have different nutrition needs than a 25 year old man, 200 pounds, and works behind a desk.  Our lifestyles need to take in to account how much exercise we get as well as our nutrition levels, how much we consume in carbohydrates vs not.

Eating nutritiously will also keep our bodies working at optimal levels, as does exercise.  I personally use hand weights, stretches, twists, leg lifts, walking, swimming and sometimes it feels like it isn't enough.  I'm considering adding in Christian Yoga as well as the T-tapp program.  These are programs for myself.  It wouldn't be "ok" for someone else, though.  I'm trying to look around to find these programs less expensively than "new."  I'm waiting patiently to find them.  That's a big part of this process of frugality--patience.

Getting enough rest is always a challenge, especially in today's busy society.  Everyone's body is unique and the needs of each person extremely vast, so to put everyone in to a cookie cutter of expectation is unrealistic.  As a parent it is our responsibility to make sure our children get the rest their little bodies need.  Also as a parent, it is important for us to care for our own needs for rest as well.  Sleep for moms of little ones who wake through the night is fleeting.  It is important for new moms to sleep when little ones sleep-round the clock to recover well from giving birth.  It is unrealistic, though, to expect toddlers and school age children to sleep as much as a newborn, so if mom has more children, it gets tricky juggling sleep.  I have put the older ones down for their naps, snuggled baby to nurse and fallen asleep with baby safely in my arms.  I've also put kid shows on, snuggled a little one, and fallen asleep for a 20  minute "catnap" without having an issue.  It is something to discover what would work well for your own family.  If a new mom doesn't get enough rest, she will develop Post Partum Depression.  I've been there before and it is a very scary place to be when the walls start closing in on you.  When that happens, it is important to tell someone to get some help.  In our society, it is a sign of weakness if we ask for help, but in my opinion, it is a sign of great strength to ask for help.

At the different stages of life there are greater needs for rest and less needs for rest.  We need to recognize those needs and adjust accordingly.  We need to communicate with our family of that need and ask for their help when we need to just go take an hour nap to feel re-energized to take on the rest of the evening fulfilling our responsibilities.

In order for our mind to work well, we need to eat, we need to sleep, and we need oxygen in the form of exercise.  In order to think about all that we need to accomplish, think clearly, and work on the variety of levels of frugality that our own personal family situation dictates, requires that we care for our bodies in an optimal manner at every stage of life.  Take care of yourself so you can take care of others!

Have a Blessed Day!

Sharing Our Gifts

Many times when one would read a title such as that, one would think of getting a gift of money or a present.  I am talking about sharing ourselves, our talents and our time.  Some of those things require a bit of our money, but usually not giving directly to any one person a monetary amount.

Throughout the time I have spent as a parent, I've tried instilling in my kids that we need to give of ourselves, even in the smallest of ways, to help in any way we can. Many times in the beginning, I've just taken my kids with me in whichever service project we were doing and expected them to help, or I gave them things to do like wiping tables, serving drinks or something like that.  As they grew in their own walk and personal likes and dislikes, they've shown that they love helping, but in their own ways.

It has been a humbling experience for me to lend my voice to the Sherwood Baptist Choir.  I am truly stretched and challenged with my own musical abilities, along with my deafness that brings additional challenges all it's own to just about everything I do.  I have always been a soprano, but due to a 3 month long bout of a variety of colds and flu a few years ago, I went from a soprano to an alto.  This is a challenge when I've learned a vast majority of songs in soprano, so much of my work has been to relearn all these songs.  It helps to stand next to some strong alto voices in choir so I don't start singing the soprano part.  The video below has been written by our Music Minister and Choir/Orchestra director Mark Willard.  He is the main vocalist with some very talented folks accompanying and singing with him.  This song is called "Hope is Rising."  From my understanding, we will be having a *Live* worship on October 9th featuring this song as well as many other favorite classic hymns.  This has been hard work for me in this time also since I've had bronchitis since 2 weeks after my knee surgery in July.  I'm excited to be a part of this, to just simply lend my voice to the choir in praise to God.  What a blessing!

This is another video to show the choir, orchestra, and a very talented and beautiful lady who is singing "I Am."




I count it a privilege to lend my voice in a very small way to the choir wherever I am planted.  Praise God!


This is what I've learned:

*When you model serving and encourage them to help and find some place to share their gifts and abilities, be prepared for when they do something unexpected.

Each of my kids have a wonderful singing voice.  As a part of their music training, they've been in the choir with me until our move to Georgia.  I've given them a choice of whether or not to join the choir and express themselves that way, but they've gone other directions.  My daughter loves working with the kids and that's the direction she's going.  My youngest son is working in security and he's enjoying that.  My oldest son is looking in to the golf cart ministry and I'm sure he'll find a niche there.

*Be prepared for them to tell you, "Mom, I'm not interested in that any more.  That's your interest."

Yup!  I heard it and it crushed my heart because they've all got beautiful voices.

*Be prepared to watch them shine in their chosen place of serving.

The happiness is unlike any other.  They're beginning to learn what it means to serve in an area where God may be leading them.


Other areas of service are available if we just keep our eyes out and ask God to show them to us.  What do I mean?  I've been told I have gifts in the kitchen.  For me, though, I just love to bake and bless people with yummy things from my kitchen.  Couple that with including children to help chop things, cleaning up, and serving those things and you have a family that serves.  This is a love of my own and I'm encouraging my kids to help me, even as they get older.  They each may have had their own special part of what is presented, but they know it is something they've helped to produce.

What are we producing this week?

All kinds of pumpkin bread done in Pampered Chef bread tubes to serve when company comes.  I have a lot of pumpkin to use.  :)

I'm gradually gathering zucchini to shred and freeze for future things like cakes, breads, and things like that.

What are we going to do in the future?  We're going to keep our eyes out for ways we can serve others with our gifts.

Remember, no gift is too menial or minor when it is done in the service of your God!

God Bless,

For the Love of Home

When the whole house is affected by sickness, things are run differently.  When the ones who are in charge of taking care of the majority of the clean up are sick, that means Mom has lots more to do.  When one who carries most of the pet responsibilities is out of town for 2 weeks, while the other 2 are sick, Mom has lots more to do, and a very busy time!

I must confess, I have delegated much of the household chores to my kids.  Let me rephrase that, "I have delegated most of the household chores to the young adults in the household."  It is something they are responsible to do regardless because "that's what adults do".  If they lived on their own, they'd be responsible for doing things regardless anyway.  When they were sick, they took Motrin, Acetaminophin, Naproxen, (Not all at the same time) or whatever else they could find to help feel better.  When they started feeling better, they took care of their basic responsibilities.  When they started not feeling well again and dogs needed let out, walked, fed/watered, or the cat cared for, I took care of that along with my own responsibilities.  The walking of the dog was when whomever felt well enough to do so since I'm under Dr's orders not to walk "for now."

I have slathered myself with Essential Oils to keep the sickness away from me because I don't like being sick and I'm going to have surgery on my knee this Tuesday.  (Since I've written this on Sunday and scheduled this to be posted on Tuesday, you'll probably read this after I've been through surgery and home already.)  I would love to be able to make sure it gets done Tuesday.  If it doesn't get done, it gets pushed off until I am better.  I'm tired of not being able to walk around the block, for exercise or for pleasure.  I love to walk, be out in God's creation and pray as I walk.  This is where I use to walk in Pennsylvania~

This lovely road curved to the right and went on and on.  I poured out my heart to the Lord on this road.  It felt good to walk, pray, and let the tears fall as I gave everything over to God.  I always came home feeling much better about whatever was bothering me.  The kids and I loved to take bikes down, walk, roller blade or canoe along this road.  My Mr. G and I use to walk meandering down this road just holding hands.  Occasionally, he took the kids inner tubing or canoeing down the river that runs by this road.  If we could find a lovely country road much like this one that runs along a lovely river here in Georgia to replace this, or something similar, I would love it!  

I've always loved being outside in God's creation.  I've had dreams of going back to South Dakota, Wyoming, and the Rocky Mountains to hike and maybe ride horses again.  I find myself longing for the west.  I do have family out west, so I know I can go see them any time.  I just yearn for the open fields, wide open skies, trees, and wild flowers.  Horseback riding cannot happen right now until I loose more weight (hence the reason this surgery is so important--so I can get to walking again and loosing more weight!).  I need to get the disc in my back checked before I do that type of activity anyway (it ruptured in 2002).  The kneeling in the garden or flower bed has ceased, for now.  The kneeling by my bed has ceased for now too.  It has been replaced with being seated, for now while I talk with my Lord numerous times in a 24 hour period.  

I'm just trying to keep myself well.

Additionally, a week and a half after my surgery, we're going to be blessed with a new puppy.  For 15 years I've prayed for a Golden Retriever puppy.  I've wanted one even longer, at least since I was a young girl.   I remember many friends who have had dogs and I love the breed.  I remember just simply starting to pray about the time my kids were little just to have a good friendly breed for my kids.  In the mean time, we trained the dogs we did have to be good friendly dogs.

I absolutely love God's timing with all of this.  My Dr tells me that after the surgery, the only physical therapy I'll need is to just walk.  Go figure!  So, after I get through surgery, I'll begin simply by just walking around my house for the first 2 days.  I'll try outside in the driveway first, then venture around on the road, building up to being able to walk more, a few feet/steps at a time.  Then when we have our new puppy, she'll walk with me as a type of therapy.  I'll need to walk, she'll need to walk, so it's a win-win situation.  God is awesome!  He's worked all this out wonderfully! 

While I am recovering, much of my daily responsibilities will be tweaked a little.  I know that my kids will pick up much of what I do, with a couple exceptions.  My hubby will pick up the other stuff with things specifically just for me to do.  I know I'll be doing more knitting and crocheting with a wee bit of sewing thrown in as well.  But, that's all good.  I love my home, taking care of everyone in it, loving on everyone and all the furry family too, no matter if I'm laid up or not.  When I am forced to sit more, it helps me to be able to be available to talk with my young folks.  They are around the living room more and they're talking with each other more.

Home...what a blessing! 

Plans Are Meant to be Broken

It has been a few weeks since updating my blog posts.  My husband has a new job here in GA and I'm trying (and failing) to get in to a good routine.  It seems that every time I think something is "just right", it turns out to not be so.  Every day is another challenge.

My plans have been to get up with my husband, ensuring he has a good breakfast and a cup of coffee to start his day. That plan was thwarted by nature.  My husband didn't want nature to call when he was doing his job, so I needed to rethink things.  I have, with the suggestion of my husband, procured granola bars and mixed nuts along with W*lmart brand energy packs instead.  I was making Trim Healthy Mama muffins in a mug for him daily from the cookbook, but it interfered with his needs, so it was scrubbed for his breakfasts.  Now he doesn't have breakfast, but has granola bars throughout the day, stopping off for an occasional burger at a fast food place when needed.  I know, not the ideal, but only he knows his routine and days, so it works for him.  The eternal conundrum in our home, however, is keeping the young folks from devouring what was meant for Daddy's lunch bag.  For the first time I've had to put a note on the box telling them they cannot have it.  But, they CAN have the Trim Healthy Mama muffins in a mug!  So, I think it's a good trade-off!  :0)  (Yes, I've been doing the Trim Healthy Mama plan since October 2015, but I'll have to leave that for another day.)  Dinners are still "on plan" though, which is good.

Here we are a month after my husband started his job and I still do not feel as if I have everything down pat.  I have a schedule, with many predictable-every-week-they-come-at-the-same-time-regardless, but it's just the other things that show up that are not predictable that throw me off.  We've had appointments for my oldest son to have entrance exams for a local technical school, other non-predictable appointments showing up, as well as activities that just adding those things make me feel so very exhausted.  This past weekend, while an absolute blessing for my two younger kids, started with homeschool group where I taught a class on edible essential oils, then went to make sure my kids ate, Sam's Club, then drop one off at one house, and another at someone else's house, get gas on my way home, then the 45+ minute drive home.  By the time I got home I was spent!  Exhaustion doesn't quite encompass it.  My body said that I should have gone home after homeschool group because my body was prepared for that, but not the extra running.  LOL

{Needless to say, I'm beginning to think that it is a good time to start keeping an eye out for property closer to all of our activities, but that remains to be seen.}

I hope to have things quiet down soon.  Tomorrow I hope to do some cleaning while my oldest son has (more) testing taken care of.  I feel like I've failed daily to get the basics done.  Oh! Let's not forget the flea infestation, the extra vet visits, the extra monetary expense and the heart wrenching that I feel when my doggies are going after yet another flea.  Yes, the vet in PA forewarned me about the fleas down here.  Ugh! We've NEVER had issues with fleas!  Whew!

So, here I am, exhausted, on the brink of being comatose with sleep, with mountains of clean blankets, rugs and furniture completely covered with Borax for more than 24 hours, a back yard that has been covered in Diatomaceous Earth, dogs and kitty have been through flea baths, and everything.  It is done and I am thankful!  But, the work continues tomorrow!  We'll be spraying for other not so savory bugs.  The traps and bait are purchased and I'm ready!

For everything, I am thankful.  I am spiritually challenged by so much pain and suffering by so many people lately.  I am thankful for the opportunity to pray for the folks who have come to me in a variety of ways to approach God's throne on their behalf.  I don't believe I've ever felt so burdened for people I've never met. (See previous post)  What a privilege to pray for all these folks!  The Lord is working on me so greatly, molding me, pruning the unnecessary, giving me gut wrenching--heart wrenching situations where I'm needed in a variety of very important people's life (not just my family, but a beautiful little boy with special needs).  I'm thankful for this! I've been challenged to ask God to show me where He needs me to join His work.  He's been a wonderful gentleman and shown me in some blatant ways.  He's also shown me ways to share our story and our faith.  What a blessing!

While I feel so very overwhelmed at times, feeling like a failure, God is faithful to redeem my time, placing me right where He needs me to be, to show His loved ones His unfathomable, always faithful love to those who need it the most.  I feel honored, and embarrassed at the same time. Honored and humbled that he would choose me. Embarrassed that my own selfish attitude has gotten in the way of His work. Lord, forgive me!

How many times are we letting those opportunities slide by when God places them right in our laps?  (You don't have to answer.)

God Bless,

Our Homeschool Group Formal

Our preparations began last Fall with looking for dresses for my daughter for the formal.  We have looked at hundreds of beautiful dresses.  We found some basic ones that everyone else would wear, so she decided to do something a little different.  She told me that she wanted an asymmetrical hem line with something long in the back, but knee length in the front.  I found this dress with spaghetti straps, so we covered her shoulders with a bolero.  She loved it!

Our youngest not so sure about what to expect with this formal business.  LOL

Our graduating Senior.

All three of our kids together with a couple of their friends.

What a fun and wonderful time for them to have with their friends!  They danced, laughed, played cards, and enjoyed one another's company.

With this being our last bit of time here, it is good for them to enjoy this time with their friends, making fond memories.

When I Can Work

I have grandiose plans to declutter, paint and pack away bunches of books, decorations and just generally get much more organized than I am now after Christmas.  My own grandiose plans have come to a roadblock of sorts.  I have entered pre-menopause and my menses are changing, lengthening up to 14 days causing a drastic lowering of my iron levels.  When that happens, nothing can stop me from taking a nap, out of sheer exhaustion.  I can sit in my chair to rest from my work and in 5 minutes be sleeping.

I have increased iron rich foods to be best of my ability.  I cannot, however, ingest sardines or organ meat.  I have been in contact with my doctor as well as an OB/GYN to pursue the next step which right now is an ultrasound.  We need to find out if there are any fibroid tumors growing inside my uterus or any abnormalities.  If there are, then we'll likely go in for a hysterectomy.  If there are no abnormalities, I'll likely go in for an ablation.  In the mean time, I do what is needful, then rest.  I need to accept this season of my life for what it is--a chance to grow the response of my kids, growing them to understand what it means to be an adult--to take the responsibility for getting things done without being asked; to step up and just get things done.

As my dear friend, Cheryl at copperswife.com says, we must "hold our plans loosely."  And so, as I release the expectations I have for myself, the plans I have for my time after Christmas is over, and simply rest, I know that I can rest in the knowledge that this is His plan for me just for now.

God Bless,

Disjointed Catch-Up Post

"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose." 

(Rom 8:26-28)

When young folks are not feeling well, we can do all we can, holding them, nurturing them, to help them feel better.  When they have concerns, we need to talk them out, showing them their options, helping them choose their words wisely in a variety of situations.  When it comes to the ultimate Healer, there is a time to give Him the concerns by praying with them through each of their concerns.   

Sometimes their concerns are far beyond anything we can fix.  Sometimes we have to lay down our own pridefulness and give our children to God in unfathomable ways.  

We have done just that in this past year.  The gut wrenching experience is one that I do not care to repeat.

Now, we've established a new normalcy, complete with different expectations, different day to day activities, and lots of appointments for all of us.

My day to day activities remain the same, but I struggle to gain a semblance of order.  Without getting enough sunlight, and beginning the cloudy time of year, I know my Sensory Affective Disorder is going to kick in soon.  I work to try to find a way around the symptoms by exercising, going on walks--even on cloudy days--getting enough nutritious foods, but I struggle to get enough sleep each night without waking through the night for whatever reason.  Keeping things in check depends greatly on getting enough sleep.  Six hours, sometimes less, of sleep each night isn't enough though.  It is work to get enough sleep.  (Go figure!)

Through all of this, we are beginning to thrust ourselves in to getting ready to move to Georgia.  I would love for all the work to be done when I snap my fingers, but it won't.  We will be downsizing, purging, decluttering, pitching, selling, and eventually giving thing away so we don't have to move them.  We only keep things that we absolutely treasure and things that are absolutely necessary.  We will definitely have many yard sales beginning in May.  To begin, though, I am selling some of our home school books.  I am taking them to our local home school group meetings to sell a little at a time.  

It is amazing how much junk one accumulates! 

We've added a puppy to our home recently.  His name is Gus.  Before Gus, by about a month, we added an adult cat whose name is Pickles.  He's a good kitty who will make sure to take care of our mice problem.  We got him because the mice were getting smarter.  Now we have 4 critters to keep each of us (almost) company.  Biscuit has enjoyed sitting on my lap while Pickles goes with my husband, Gus has taken a very strong liking to JL and Rustie enjoys getting attention from anyone.  He is getting older and will probably be facing his final time through this winter.  That's why we have Gus now.

We've canned quite a bit more this year than we have last year and the year before.  This year we've made 2 batches of salsa--over 20 quarts--sauce, stewed tomatoes, and hot peppers.  We are looking at pumpkin next and whatever else we can preserve.  If we haven't eaten all of it by the time we move then we'll take it with us.  We plan to put in a garden next year just in case our house doesn't sell.  

Last week our kids participated in the Clarion Autumn Leaf Festival with the Civil Air Patrol.  JL is holding the rifle in the left front, HJ is right behind him holding the banner, and DA is right over her shoulder in the back.  They did a phenomenal job!

Now we concentrate on schooling.  I struggle with getting much in, so I'm working on that as well as the many other things mentioned above right now.  If you don't see me around for a while, that is why.  I may document my purging journey in all its glory--messes and everything.  In order to purge, you need to make a mess, right?  We've lived in this house for 9 years, so I'm sure the mess will be huge!

~Until next time~

God Bless,

Beginning our 12th Year of Home School

The beginning of our school year is in full swing.  We started our book work on Monday August the 5th with very light school and very low expectations.  I gave them only 2 days worth of school, but months ago we were planning to go camping and we've had to wait to see what new schedule my husband was getting since his promotion.  I just kept the original plan of 2 days of school in place and had them work at their own paces to get their feet whet for school this year.  Now that we have 2 full weeks of school under our belts, we're well on our way.

I've counted days for school since July 1st, however.  We've done tons of things that are education related like field trips, work, drama, VBS, consumer math, hospitality, among a host of other things.  Our "book work" began in August.  How can I "get away" with starting to count days on July 1st?  We live a lifestyle of learning every day.  Each thing we do establishes a learning opportunity.  Even though every day can be different, it is still bringing us learning experiences.

I have a Senior, a Sophomore and an 8th grader this year.  I have very little to help them with daily because they're independent learners now.  I check their work to see what they're having problems with, explain and teach when necessary with the older 2.  With my youngest I have a bit more to do, but it is decreasing with each passing year.

As much as I enjoy not having as much teaching time, it leaves me with time to sit on the front porch with my hubby talking, enjoying our coffee and doing our Bible study together.  It is such a blessed time for me to spend time with my husband studying the Bible together.

I didn't take "first day of school" pictures at all.  I use to do that, but it has fallen by the wayside this year.  I think it is just because our first day of school came and went without fanfare.  However, I do have a picture that I took with my phone of the 3 children together not too far from July 1st, at a wedding at the end of June.  =0)

From left to right:  JL(14), HJ(15), & Daniel(18)

My husband tells me that once our children turn 18, we can address them online by their first names.  Daniel just turned 18 on August 19th.  We took pictures when we woke him up, but I don't think he was ready to wake up.  LOL 

Needless to say, he and Mr. G continue to look for just the right car for him.  Of course it has to pass Mr. G's expectations.  Once he gets a car, he'll take his behind the wheel exam a second time.  He took it with our Suburban and when he parallel parked, the front driver's side corner was sticking our 6" too far and forgot to turn his blinker on once, so the tester failed him. :0(   Now, we wait until Daddy can find a car for him. =0)

This school year began with a rotating schedule for my husband.  Now that he's been promoted, he has regular predictable days off each week.  I've adjusted our school schedule to accommodate Daddy's days off so each of us can rest, have fun, and work together on a variety of things.  Since this is Daddy's 2nd week in his new position, it has left my kids a little out of sorts.  While we usually take Sundays off, rarely have we taken 2 days off in a row on a regular basis.  They were looking around and at times, wandering around wondering what they could do with themselves.  LOL

As time moves along here in the next week, we'll probably increase the amount of canning that we're doing with the tomatoes ripening.  We count canning time as school too.  I just remove their computer school work from the day so it doesn't "pile up" on them.  Young folks learning how to can the produce from the garden is important, so we integrate that in to our days in the late summer.

A life style of learning is something that has allowed us to not be encumbered by limiting our learning to just school times, but has expanded our learning to all parts of our lives.  Just this morning I left the weather loop on the computer for the kids to see when they came past.  Daniel found a map of water temperatures when upon closer inspection, they discovered where water currents are due to those currents being a different color.  

Life is full of learning experiences.  It encompasses each of our daily lives.  What a wonderful blessing, if we recognize those potential learning opportunities and embrace them with thankfulness.

July Fourth-Two-Thousand-Thirteen

I'm finding myself a bit melancholy lately.  I guess it probably doesn't help much that an upper level "Low" has stationed itself above us and is keeping the area cloudy with lots of rain and thunderstorms.

My work continues inside regardless of the weather, but when my work is done inside and it is raining outside, I've been looking on Google maps in preparation for our vacation next year.

I've looked at how to get to Dinosaur Park in Rapid City, SD so that my family can see what I use to see as a child from Skyline Drive while we enjoy a picnic lunch.  I love watching their faces when they see lovely and glorious things!

I've looked up a variety of campgrounds and I find myself faced with a difficult decision of which one to stay at for however many days for this stop or that stop.  I'll need to do the majority of the research, then present my findings to Mr. G to see what he'd like to do.  Here are a few that I've found:

Lake Park Campground--Located 30 minutes from Sturgis and 30 minutes from Mount Rushmore.

Days End Campground--Located in Sturgis.

Whistler Gulch Campground--Located in Deadwood.

Sleepy Hollow Campground--Located in Wall, SD.

I know he'd like to visit the Sturgis Motorcycle Museum.  I'd like to see it as well since my great uncle Al was one of the founders since he use to live in Sturgis.  =0)

I'd love to take the family to Lead & Deadwood, SD to see where Black Hills Gold is mined.  My mother use to work in the gold mines when I was 8 years old, so it has a bit of historical significance for me.

Of course Mount Rushmore, Crazy Horse, and Custer State Park would be visited. =0)

Why all these preparations now?

Every time I'm around a pine tree the scent of the Black Hills comes flooding back to my memories.  The west is calling me greatly.  The search on Google maps has brought me blue skies and glorious scenery of the west.  The memories of God's magnificent beauty and the experiences there--both good and bad--come flooding back to me.  I want to replace the bad with new memories, and I want to share those things with my beloved husband and my wonderful children.  I feel as if my time is running out with my kids at home and it is time to hasten the trip.

Does this seem unreasonable?  I don't think so.  Things like this are very attainable, if prepared for ahead of time and as many details worked out as possible, right down to the miles driven daily and planning how many times you'll go out to eat, adding 10-20% for tips.  Additionally, what foods you'll pack in the cooler, bottles of spring water to bring, right down to which rest stop you'll be at when you eat your sandwiches or salads.

I need to plan very well for this trip, for the sake of my husband, for the sake of my children, for my own sanity, right down to where and when we'll do our laundry.  Why so meticulous?

In the planning, there is peace.

Blessed Time with Precious Friends

She saw the camera.  :0)

Happy to see our friends again.

Kids playing...Mommas too! 

Thinking about swinging with reckless abandon.  LOL

Here he comes!

Precious girl in her adorable hat swinging on the swing. 

Wonderful friend, Lisa!

And her hubby, Dale. 

Their youngest trying to decide where to play first. :0)

"Quick, strike a pose!  Mom's got the camera!"  LOL

Playing a game with the others in the basement.

Today Biscuit let all the kids hold him!  What fun!  As you can see, he loves getting in to the hoods of people's jackets.  He fits perfectly.  LOL

Awe, nuts!  Mr. G caught me with the camera!  LOL

Good times, lots of pizza and laughter.  What a blessing! 

Forgiveness, Boundaries & Letter Writing

I have never been very good at writing letters.  I write a letter to my mother once every 3 months or so.  I send her pictures and give her updates to our family.  This may seem like "not enough" for your families.  Between my kids and I, it wouldn't be enough.  But, it is important for me to write to my mother, multiple pages, with lots of pictures about 4 times a year. This is how I keep her informed about the good news of our lives, encourage her in her life and share the gospel with her.  

[What you are about to read is history, nothing more.]

You see, I've found that within the past year that she's been keeping these letters now, instead of ripping them apart.  Why would she rip them apart?  In 2008, my daughter broke her leg.  

My mother felt it necessary to take that point in time to desire to come see us, for HJ's sake.  It would have been fine, and it still is fine for her to come for a visit, but I told her that I needed to talk with Mr. G about it and get back to her.  He was preoccupied in the garage, eye-brow deep in an electrical issue that was more important to wait than to ask him right then.  Once he finished, we discussed it and decided that she could come, as long as she respected our house rules and  "no swearing", and she needed a way back because she originally made the request with a "one-way" ticket.  These were my husband's requirements.  They were thought about quite extensively by him over night and I tried presenting them to her the next day, but she wouldn't answer her phone.  Because I didn't call her back "right away", she thought my Mr. G "didn't love her."  So when I finally got to talk with her 2 days later, she decided that she wasn't going to come and had some choice words for me and hung up the phone on me.  I called her back and let her know that I would not allow her to treat me that way, nor my children or my husband.  [I'd heard how she had treated my niece and how she was treating my sister and her fiance.  I wasn't going to allow it with myself or my family.]  I said it in to her supposedly broken answering machine, but I don't know if she actually heard anything I said.  

I honored her and continued sending her cards, letters and Christmas gifts only to find out that she had been dumping it, unopened, into the trash can.  She didn't know about the gifts, gift cards, loving words or anything.  My sister-in-law told me that she had been doing these things since July 2008.  

HJ in her neon pink cast, picking peas from her square foot garden as a snack.

My mother came upon some pretty desperate financial times that we didn't know about, neither did my brother and sister-in-law.  My sister knew, but wouldn't tell us about it for some strange reason (pride maybe...not sure).  But when my brother called and told me, we helped her in every way we could think of.    To say that she had a very difficult time taking that first check and buying groceries with it is putting things mildly.  She was beligerant, disrespectful and not even wanting to cash it, but wanted my brother and sister-in-law to send it back to us.  She didn't want to touch it.  Well, after talking with her, my brother finally convinced her to sign it and my sister-in-law went shopping with her to get her some much needed groceries.    The second check went a little easier and the third a little easier still.  Once my nephew, little Billy, was born, she had one more check to cash and tend to on her own.  She had no other choice.  So, she did it.  

She's received letters and cards and packages through my aunt and brother after she was kicked out of her trailer and moved in with my sister and her fiance.  My sister's fiance has a "history", so we didn't send packages directly to her.

This was taken right before my brother found out that she needed help. 

My aunt took this picture last fall '11.

Fast forwarding to this year, 2012....she reads my letters, opens my card AND, I've spoken with her, as the kids have as well, on Skype and the telephone.

She has had a very bitter, rebellious attitude all of her life.  If people do not do what she wishes, she cuts them off from her life, as she did with me and my family for setting up reasonable boundaries.  I am thankful for God giving me the strength to set up those boundaries and keep them in place, standing my ground not only for the sake of my children and husband, but for the peace of my home.

Boundaries need to be set up and readjusted as time progresses and as need arises.  My mother has been honored, but she's not been allowed to have any lasting effect on my family.  Communication with my children has been limited for that reason.  It's been only "on the surface" for their sakes, up until now.  I foresee a time when that "protection" that has been placed there for their own good, will be not just challenged, but also brought face to face to deal with...when we visit...in person.  I don't know when this will happen, but I foresee it happening within the next 2 years.  We'll see how much she has truly respected and forgiven me and my husband for setting up healthy to protect our children at that time.

Until then, I send her letters, with one way communication.  She doesn't call me since she only has local calling abilities on her telephone.  She calls my brother and sister-in-law from my sister's phone, but doesn't call me.  I'm still considering and praying about sending her a tracfone.  We'll see.  I call her when I know she'll be at my aunt's house, or I can Skype with her there.

All of this to say that I do not have the perfect mother.  She is undiagnosed with numerous problems as an adult, and refuses to be diagnosed, labelled or treated for those things.  She treats my sister, her fiance, neice(s), sister-in-law, brother, nephew(s) good when she feels like it.  The other times, it is open for anyone's guess as to whether they'll be verbally abused or manipulated, worse yet, physically abused.

We have to have boundaries in place with her because we love her, because since she hasn't shown self control for herself, we have to give that to her through boundaries.  She is allowed to speak to the children, but we will not allow cursing.  She is allowed to see them via Skype, but she is not allowed to say anything about their appearance or our religious beliefs.  I stay very close by, even listening to the conversations, stepping in where I need to.

This does not cause me great anxiety any longer.  I have forgiven her for the things she's done to me through her abuse as a child and an adult, her disrespect of my husband and my children through her actions.  I would love to go out and see her, talk with her, share with her about our lives, pray with her, sing to her with the kids, but finances will not allow that right now.

This is why I write letters.  I am honoring her the best way I can and know how.  Hoping to give her what she needs, even though she's never been that type of person to me.  To say that it is monumentally difficult is definitely in the ball park.  She doesn't say, "I love you" and never has.  Her "moment" of love for us was when she decided not to abort us.  So, you see the mountainous undertaking I've felt needed to be done is always there, showing her love, because I do love her.

If you have a mother, step-mother or mother figure who loves you, looks out for your well being, teaches you, pours her life in to yours and sacrifices for you, be abundantly thankful.

This is me with Emmie.  God blessed me with her for my step-mom when I was just 14.  She taught me how to love and how to be a Mom.  She was the Godly example I needed to transform in to the type of wife and mother God needed me to be.  He's still not finished with me yet. ;)

God took her home in 1997.  I miss her every day.

Be thankful for your mom, no matter what!