(This was written in September 2013, but is still pertinent today.)
In the experience we've had, purposely sparing details, we've all realized the importance of choice and the ability to say "No!" emphatically. We've seen what we "don't" want to see in a future suitor for our daughter in the disrespectful immaturity of 2 young men. We've also seen the affects on her heart when the young men go where they're not supposed to go--aside from her Daddy's authority, breaking boundaries--hurting her heart. Today, her heart is still sore. She's been disrespected as has our whole family in how one young man acted. That's how it is with young ladies. They think and rethink about things until they can truly put it behind them. Fortunately for her sake, this experience has given her much greater resolve to submit herself to the "weeding out" of potential suitors to her father.
As she prepares for her future, and eventual marriage, I'm reminded through my daily reading and through God's creation of the "one-ness" that marriage represents. The black-eyed susan flower in the above picture is a fluke that I've never seen before this year. The 3-in-one of the "eye" represented marriage so very poignantly. As I thought about scripture and the relationship this flower has to marriage, it was all so clear to me. Marriage is made up of 3 people--God, husband, and wife. All 3 are distinctly individuals by themselves, but when they're joined, the flow between them should look much like this flower's eye--without break, without the outline of the individual. Without this relationship between the 3, marriage can be very rough. (Ask me how I know...more on that at another time.)
In this post, I elaborated about the amount of reading involved in preparing for courtship. There is more, much more!
Today...February 7, 2014--
There is much more prayer involved as well. The prayers I have been praying for each of my children is that God would guide and direct them in their lives to the person that He would have for them. We are praying for the young people God has for our young folks--that He would help them to develop obedience, respect for their parents' guidance and for a life's desire of following...no chasing after Jesus. I pray this for my children too. I want nothing more than to know that my children (& "in-loves") walk in truth. Their lives assuredly will not be easy. I know that my life has not been easy. To assume or desire that their lives are easy is selfish of me. I love my children and I know the Lord has a plan for their lives. I hope and pray that they (and their future spouses) love the Lord with all their heart.
How will it look? As far as our daughter is concerned (ladies first, right?), the young men will need to approach my Mr. G to ask permission to pursue courtship with our daughter.
If you look along the left side bar, you'll see "Courtship Questions for Potential Suitors" in a box that will lead you to a link by Stacy McDonald that her husband wrote to prepare for their daughters' eventual courtship/suitors. We're beginning to consider these questions.
As for our sons, they are praying for God's guidance and direction in their lives to know which direction to go with their careers, homes and future wives. They will seek the hand of their prospective wife through her Father.
From that point, respecting the authorities over the young folks, God will write their love stories, not me, nor my husband nor anyone else. We are seeking purity for our young folks and they are desiring future mates who are pure and who have not been involved (dating or courtship) with someone else--giving only a portion of their hearts to them on their wedding days.
I know that my daughter will no longer be allowing herself to develop a "best friendship" with a young man unless he has approached Mr. G. She is a very wise young lady--wise beyond her years. She is decided to keep her heart, requested a purity ring in addition to her "key to my heart" necklace, and if any young man approaches her, she is directing them to her father. She is also pursuing Jesus with a renewed vigor. She doesn't feel that she should even think about a romantic relationship until she is 20. A wise young lady indeed.
While this seems like an impossible task, it isn't. With God, all things are possible.
